so heartwarming but so so heartbreaking

Hello my muses, 

Sorry for not posting recently. To make up for it though, I have a lot to talk about in this blog post!

We just finished the first week of Term 2 and boy am I ready for school to be over, which is bittersweet because I can't stomach having to say goodbye to all my friends. While the holidays were really nice, I spent the whole time stressing about school. And also procrastinating my homework. Now I have my maths test next week and I am SCARED. Please to anyone listening, please let me do well. Oh also, during the holidays, I watched 'A Minecraft Movie' with my siblings and my friends. We came for the funsies and boy did it deliver. I was laughing at everything, but mostly the audience reactions. The whole cinema would start clapping at big moments and cheering and it was just so funny to me. 10/10 would recommend this movie just for the cinema experience. 

Every week flies by so quickly. It's hard to keep up sometimes and I lowkey forget what happens each day. There are some exciting stuff coming up though. We have the senior formal near the end of the term which I'm excited for because it was actually pretty fun last year. I still have to get a dress though. What colour should I pick? Last year I wore this pink sparkly dress but I don't know what to wear this year. I try and look at other people's dresses online but they all look really good and I don't know how to decide what style I want. Last year, I kinda just bought the first dress I liked because I didn't take it too seriously since I would have another one the following year. But now that my last formal has come, I want my dress to be perfect. I'm also scared about the makeup side of things because I'm lowkey really bad at it and just smudge things around on my face. I guess I have a couple of months to practice. Last time I wore a full face of makeup, my face broke out really bad so I'm not looking forward to that.

On a whim, I decided to watch 'When Life Gives You Tangerines', a Korean show that recently came out. I'd heard of the show before but did not know what I was getting myself into when I started it. Halfway through the first episode, I was already bawling my eyes out. Little did I know, I would cry during every episode. 16 in total. The show felt very real and the emotions that the characters felt was portrayed so well and I just could not stop crying. It starts in the 1960's in Jeju, a small Korean island, and goes through to the 2020's. Even though it's a different culture, I kept thinking about how this was probably what my grandparents' lives looked like when they were growing up. It's crazy to think how different our childhoods were, just a couple generations apart. It also makes me wish I grew up in Vietnam, because as privileged as I am to live the way I do, I feel like I have to sacrifice my connection to my culture. 

The show would hint at an upcoming event through foreshadowing or jumping to the future without much context, and once everything is revealed, it just hits so much harder. One of the main themes of the show is family, especially the love from our parents. There were so many similarities that I noticed between my own relationship with my parents and the ones shown in the show. How my mum's whole world is her children, how my dad quietly carries the family on his back. I can't think of any universe where I can survive without my parents and I'm just so grateful for them. This show also makes me appreciate life a bit more. Right now, it's hard to have any motivation to work towards my future because I just can't imagine anything other than the present, but I know this is just a small part of my life that I will one day look back on. Anyway, this show was so heartwarming but so so heartbreaking. It made me feel so many things at once and it was just beautifully presented. I do recommend you guys to watch it because it will give you a new outlook to life (whilst also making you cry buckets). 

Thank you for reading my lovely muses. Here's to another (long) term. 

- Jessica